EVER WONDER...

...why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

...why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

...why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

...why "abbreviated" is such a long word?

...why doctors call what they do "practice"?

...why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98?

...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid
is made with real lemons?

...why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?

...why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food?

...who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?

...why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?

...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

...why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the
indestructible black box ?

...why sheep don't shrink when it rains?

...why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?

...if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

...why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?

In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods :

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping (and that's the only time I
have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside
down."(well..duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of
construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with
head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not
enable you to fly."

I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one:

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Dawn Brozek, senior Internet analyst at NetRatings,says: "Generally speaking, women shoulder a majority of the household responsibilities and therefore face a 'time poverty' at home, with less leisure time than men to spend on activities such as surfing the Internet."

Rava

Cubs fight viciously, often quite literally from the moment they're born. BBC's Carnivore! series has gruesome footage illustrating this. A hyena has given birth to three cubs, and two are already fighting savagely – until they notice the third, still being licked dry, and attack it. As many as 25 percent of all cubs may die from such fights before adulthood. The worst fighting is between two sisters in the same litter. As soon as she can, the stronger female will kill the weaker. Unlike most carnivores, hyenas are born with their eyes open and teeth functional.

Q: Doesn't the mother stop this?
A: Occasionally she tries, but it's a losing battle. Also, cubs dig a network of smaller tunnels from the birthing den, tunnels into which the adults don't fit, and will kill each other there. Or, the weaker cub may be so intimidated that it doesn't dare come out to nurse and so starves to death.