"The only thing they could find to do with him, however, was take him into the Army as a private and make him a major four days later so that Congressmen with nothing else on their minds could go trotting back and forth through the streets of Washington, D.C., chanting, 'Who promoted Major Major? Who promoted Major Major?' Actually, Major Major had been promoted by an I.B.M. machine with a sense of humor almost as keen as his father's".